Does anyone else with Fibromyalgia feel like your life has been taken away?
I have suffered for many many years since i've been at least 15 with severe fatigue, low energy, heaviness in the limbs, weakness, headaches- now have become migraines. Burning muscle pain in my neck,shoulders and back. numbness in my arms and legs, crawling sensations and a list a mile long. After having every test done possible, visiting every kind of specialist- all rules they can't find anything and a dozen dr.'s say it's fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue. Now 38, married with kids my symptoms have grown worse- feels like MS or Lyme but still dr.'s tell me its fibro and tests are neg.
It's sucks so much- I do not work. couldn't hold a job if i tried. I could sleep for days. I have no life, no friends, no one that understands what i'm suffering. I get tired very easily. Does fibromyalgia really make you feel this bad? I'm on the verge of divorce because my husband has boundless energy, is a compulsive runner, thinks i'm lazy - it's in my head, i get no emotional support and have tried to find groups near me with no luck. My teen girls are my only friends and someone to talk to, they understand and thankfully help with household chores and they are angry with my husband's selfishness" all about him" and his image. I guess a good way he can meet sexy women, cheat on his wife while i'm suffering with an illness and feeling so alone.
Public Comments
1. You are so not alone. I will come back and answer later when I have more energy and less pain. I just woke up, so it's at it's worst. See you in a bit.2. Guess what?????????? Now you have a friend who also has this terrible "fibro".I also have SLE which means systemic lupus E.I can't even spell the last word.It's a long one but back to your story and question.I went the exact same thing with my ex-husband,with my lupus pains,and my fibro pains.It was just too much even for me to bear!! also my 2 daughters helped me with the household chores.And now I have re-married,I'm just trying now to focus all of my positive energy into trying to manage the fibro and the lupus.I have also felt the exact same way that you are feeling right now...I know how depressing it is when noone even stops to think about how you are really feeling/out. I don't take prescribed pain meds they just added to my health issues.My husband now he works 7 days a week 12 hours a day.And he takes really good care of me.Your husband just needs to understand and realize that fibro IS a terrible health condition,and you are suffering,and can't always depend on your children for help.Because your childrem also have a life outside the home.I sometimes can't even get my feet on the floor when I wake up in the mornings.And it's sooo depressing for me too,but there is 1 thing that I have learned about "fibro". You just have to push yourself sometimes,when you wake in the morning.Go get a HOT shower,and stand in the HOT shower for a long time(15 min.) That really helps me for a while anyways.If your doctor has prescribed you pain meds.Take a glass of water put the water on a table right next to your bed.And in the morning time,take your pain meds.before you even get out of bed.Wait a little while(time for the pain meds to work). Then wake take the hot shower...I really don't know what else to tell you.except that I also have fibro(sucks) and lupus on top of that...just hang in there.I know my answer is more like a book.I just wanted to at least give you a useful tip about taking the hot shower.It works for a while,I want you to know that when you feel depressed like you are now,the fibro pain can and will only increase....This is something that you will have for the rest of your life.I myself have had fibro for about 18 years.I'm also 38..you just can't allow this to drag you down dear....sometimes you will have to force your way through the days.If I can do it...so can you dear...and even now every morning when I get up from my bed.I have to walk like a duck(with my feet not bending at all) because the pain is too much.But I do it....the more sad and depressed you get,the more pain you get.Well I hope at least my story helped you in some ways.Remember...you can over come this...you just have to want it bad enough..THE BEST OF LUCK TO YOU. And your children are just great!!! Good kids!!!
3. Hi Paula, I've had CFS and Fibro since the days they called it CFIDS. I do have an immune dysfunction component, so CFIDS fits me better than CFS, but it's the newew catch-phrase. In ten years, they will call it something else. So 1993 for me, and yes, at first I felt like it stole my life. I had to leave my career and my hobbies and all my outside activities. My attitude was that of a total victim, and why not? It may have been deserved, but it didn't help me. It hurt. Another friend with CFS and Fibro recommended the book Simple Abundance by Sarah von Brethnack (sp?). It helped turn my thinking around and helped me have more control over my feelings. Soon I wasn't feeling like a victim anymore, and believe it or not, that brought more pain relief than all those meds I was prescribed. I've also been in A.A and N.A. for 20 years, and the 12 steps reinforced the idea of me being responsible for my feelings. They are not someone elses's fault. They are how I choose to react. This empowered me in a way I had never felt before, and it helps in dealing with the CFS and Fibro. Don't misunderstand. My career is still gone. My working days are over. I can't/don't do much housework. I cannot do so many things I would like to do, but I focus on the things I can do that I enjoy. It helps keep my spirits up. Every morning I find something that I am grateful for, and I focus on that for a while. I have a simple little program. Every day I do something to help somebody else, and every day I must laugh and do something I enjoy. I like it here at YA, and I love figure skating, so I answer questions and watch Michelle Kwan videos. I will watch Comedy Channel if I can't find something else to laugh at.
I am fortunate in that I now have a mate who likes doing laundry and vacuuming, and he's not a bad cook. I was married to a man who, even though he did understand my illness, he was a total slob, so when we couldn't afford a cleaning woman, I felt guilty when the house was not clean. I also just hate a disorganized mess, even though I can't necessarily organize anymore, so I found the right mate for me this time around. I strongly suggest you try that book Simple Abundance to start your journey into taking back your life. You will be much happier by the time you are finished the book. That's a promise!
4. I've had fibromyalgia/CFS for several years and yes, fibromyalgia does make you feel that bad. I also have an immune dysfunction like greenwitchtime, but that seems to be under control. Jennifer and greenwichtime have already given you some very good advice. Like Jennifer said, you may have to really push yourself every morning when you get up. I had a very hard time holding down my job at first, but I just kept pushing myself and I seem to be doing okay with my job now. The problem is that my job now consumes 99% of my energy and I have very little left for the rest of my life. It's not been fun, but I am hanging in there and so can you!
